Among other Southeast Asians, Thais stand out for their thinking and their body language. If you stay here long enough, it can happen to you, become an honorary Thai that is. You gradually find yourself speaking pidgin English. In the provinces you join the voluntary work-gangs cleaning the toilets and weeding the flowerbeds at the local high school. In fact, you become a better person!
　  You no longer cry over split milk, adopting the mai pen rai attitude to life. You even dispense chai yen rai to that beer belly European pensioner who's complaining about the fees charged by a dusky beauty hostess. 
　  For the two-week visitor however, knowing what to do and what not to do is not an easy task. Take heads, hand and feet. A little girl sells you flowers so you tousle her hair. Big mistake. Heads are sacred and must never be touched. People have for less. Hands are meant to give and take, right hand only of course, not to touch and tickle. God gave you feet to plant firmly on the ground. Never point with them, never show your soles, and always, always, keep them out of sight in temples when you sit down to contemplate the Buddha image.
　  So you want a massage? One of those turn your muscles to putty massages with some odd contortions on the side? We tell you how to differentiate between traditional massage parlours and those offering, well, more forbidden fruit pleasures. We also tell you as a respectable girl about town, how to behave so that your holiday is a memorable one without the hassles that can befall single ladies.
　  To ensure that you, the foreign resident, fleeting visitor or armchair traveller, enjoy your stay in Thailand, we present a light-hearted but practical guide to the dos&don'ts of this very special country. DON'T be surprised if that pretty salesgirl on the perfume counter is a man. There's a place for everyone in Thai society. DO believe your eyes: yes, that roadside stall is selling deep fried grasshoppers and caterpillars. And yes, DO listen very hard to the whispering that passes for conversation: Thais do not raise their voices, so why should you? DO be assured that as a foreigner you can get away many things, but DON'T lose your temper. Want to know what you can and cannot talk about with Thais? Then DO buy this book!